How Can I Help My Adult Child Cope With My Illinois Divorce?

 Posted on June 25, 2019 in Divorce

When a married couple decides to get a divorce, a child under the age of 18 is directly affected. In Illinois, the parental responsibilities for a child are allocated between parents during divorce. The living situation of a young child may change as well, since parenting time is also split between each parent. However, once a child becomes an adult and has moved out of the house, the parents' divorce may not change his or her day-to-day life, but it can still have a significant emotional impact. It is important for parents to communicate with their adult child throughout their divorce proceedings, and this can help all family members make as smooth a transition as possible. 

Tips for a Positive Relationship With Your Adult Child

Parents may assume that an adult child will be unaffected by divorce. In fact, a child of any age who is watching his or her parents get divorced is still likely to face a variety of challenges. When living away from home, a divorce may come as a shock, and a child may struggle to adjust to the changes. Although an adult child can, in theory, process the trauma of divorce better than a young child, he or she may not want to deal with the emotional baggage, and this can cause relationships between parents and children to suffer.

If you have an adult child and are preparing to divorce, consider the following tips to maintain a healthy relationship with your child: 

• Do Not Make Them Take Sides: If there are pending issues between you and your spouse, talking about it with your adult child may seem like a natural choice. However, your child most likely still admires his or her other parent, and speaking ill of your spouse will make him or her feel uncomfortable. When getting a divorce, do not make your child pick sides. Be as sensitive as you would be with your adult child as you would if you were divorcing while he or she was younger. Sharing too much information may not only damage the relationship between your child and ex-spouse, but it can hurt your relationship with your child as well. 
• Consider Their Feelings: An adult child may be able to process his or her parents divorcing better than a younger child, but there is still room for feelings of loss or grief. While an adult may understand that the divorce is not his or her fault, he or she may still feel a sense of guilt. An adult child may question whether parents stayed together for his or her sake. Reassure your child that your divorce is a personal choice between you and your spouse that took place later in life. You should also try to avoid relying on your child for emotional support during your divorce, since this can put him or her in an awkward position and end up making the process more difficult for both of you.

Contact a Schaumburg Divorce Lawyer

Going through a divorce may seem easier at a later stage in life, and you may expect a smoother process if your child is grown. However, these situations pose different kinds of challenges, and an adult child can still be affected emotionally by the break-up of the family. It is important to consider children's feelings throughout your divorce proceedings, regardless of their age. In addition, it is essential to seek legal advice to make sure that your rights are protected throughout the divorce process. To ensure that you are able to complete your divorce as smoothly and effectively as possible, contact an experienced Barrington divorce attorney. Call the skilled legal team at A. Traub & Associates at 630-426-0196 to set up an initial consultation today.

Sources:

https://www.huffpost.com/entry/my-parents-split-up-when-i-was-an-adult-it-didnt-hurt-any-less_n_561d4623e4b028dd7ea553ac