Surviving the Holidays After Divorce

 Posted on December 18, 2018 in Divorce

No matter what holiday you celebrate this time of year, if you are recently divorced with children, it can be difficult to let go of your ex-spouse and the times you had. Family holidays like Christmas typically increase the level of communication between you, and if this is your first holiday season after your split or divorce, planning festivities may feel like a daunting task. Your parenting plan is a great place to start. 

A parenting plan should provide a breakdown of all important holidays. School-aged children have extra time off this time of year, so your plan should reflect that in a manner that is fair to both parents. Splitting a child’s time off and allowing each parent to have either Christmas or Christmas Eve is a good way to go. 

Despite the cheer and excitement of your children, the holidays can be a lonely time for those who have recently gone through a divorce or are currently in the middle of the divorce process. Family holidays are a tough reminder that you are no longer married, and your family has split. Here are some tips for getting through the holidays:

Put Kids First

This time of year should be all about your children. This does not necessarily mean showering them with expensive gifts, but showing them love. The holidays are a perfect time to remind your children that despite the divorce, both parents love them. Instead of thinking of ways to get back at your ex, try to work together to bring some extra holiday magic this year. 

Reduce Expectations

It is okay if the first holiday season after divorce is a little rocky. Maybe your plans are not perfect, or something does not go how you would like, but there will be plenty of other years to get it right. If you have a positive attitude toward the imperfections, your children will pick up on that. Teach them the true meaning of the holidays by being thankful for what you have together.

Practice Self-Care

This could mean taking time for yourself to read a book or take a long bath, but self-care can also be about forgiveness and steps to better yourself. If you struggle with your feelings post-divorce, keep a journal or seek help from a therapist. Taking care of yourself will make it easier to enjoy the holidays and create special memories for your children.  

Contact a Schaumburg Divorce Attorney

If you need to modify your parenting plan for the holidays or due to changing circumstances, contact an experienced Palatine divorce attorney at A. Traub & Associates today. Call 630-426-0196 to set up an initial consultation.

Source: 

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/divorced-children/200812/managing-divorce-and-children-during-the-holidays