Posted on August 27, 2018 in Divorce

“What did you do this summer?” This question is often asked when children go back to school, but for some children, summer was not all pool parties and playgrounds. For a child whose parents got a divorce over the summer, this question can be intimidating and stressful. A child who has divorced parents can exhibit certain behaviors and symptoms in school which can affect their education if not handled properly. The logistics of having a child in school can be complicated for any family, and a family with divorced parents can experience more stress and trouble than others. However, by following these tips, you can help your child’s school year go more smoothly:

1. Determine Who Will Pay for School Supplies

A new school year means new school clothes, shoes, uniforms, backpacks, and lunch boxes--not to mention the long list of school supplies. These costs add up quickly, so you should determine how they will be divided between you and your ex. If you already have a preset arrangement, stick to that. If not, dividing the cost in half is usually a good way to meet your child’s needs without causing conflict.

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 Posted on August 20, 2018 in Adoption/Guardianships

Military life is not always the most stable--those who are in the military or grew up in a military family can attest to that. But now, more adoption agencies and child welfare groups are recognizing that military families are just as capable of providing a loving and welcoming home for children as any other family. Though being in the military does pose unique circumstances, it also means that you may be able to receive certain benefits when adopting a child that are not available to anyone who is not in the armed forces.

Complications With the Adoption Process for Military Families

Military life is unique and brings with it many specific circumstances that other families may not experience or have to deal with, especially when they are going through the adoption process. These include:

• Moving: The family member who is in the military will periodically be reassigned to different military bases, which is called a permanent change of station (PCS). This can be troublesome to families who are in the adoption process, because adoption laws vary from state to state. While it is easier to complete the process while you are in one duty station, it is not impossible to complete an adoption during a move--it just might take a little longer.

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 Posted on August 10, 2018 in Child Custody

Everyone knows that divorce is hard on all of those who are involved - especially the kids. Even if you try to keep them out of the fighting and the negotiations, you may not realize how much your children actually pick up on. They can sense when there is tension between their parents, but they often do not know what to do about it, and this can cause them a great deal of stress. One way that divorced parents may be able to help their children cope with the changes to their lives is by using a unique co-parenting arrangement called “nesting.”

What Is a Nesting Arrangement?

This type of co-parenting agreement occurs when a divorced couple keeps the family home, and the children reside there 100 percent of the time--it is the parents who come and go. A separate living space, such as an apartment, is rented so the parents have somewhere to go when the other parent is at the house with the children. Or, in some cases, each parent will have their own living space to go to. This type of arrangement puts the focus on making the children comfortable with the parents’ divorce and alleviating the stress that children feel when they are constantly hauled back and forth between residences.

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 Posted on August 03, 2018 in Divorce

Breaking up is hard to do, and when you have been married and spent years of your life with another person, ending your relationship can be even harder. Divorce can leave many people with feelings of depression, anxiety, and loneliness, but there are things you can do to help yourself through the transition period after a divorce:

1. Allow Yourself to Grieve

This is probably the most important step to healing after a divorce. While you are not mourning the loss of your spouse’s life, you are mourning the loss of a relationship. Your marriage was a very significant relationship, and ending it will require you to completely reconfigure your life. Even if you were the one who wanted and initiated the divorce, you still should allow yourself time to fully comprehend the changes you are experiencing.

2. Get Professional Help

Often, people find it therapeutic to share their feelings with someone who can help them look at their thoughts in an analytical way. Getting help from a therapist or counselor who is well-versed in family law and divorce can benefit you greatly. Seeing a therapist can help you work through your emotions and begin the healing process.

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 Posted on July 24, 2018 in Divorce

First comes love, then comes marriage, then comes...divorce? When you got married, you might have thought you would live happily ever after, but the truth is, divorce is not uncommon, especially in the United States. Though divorce happens for myriad reasons, and no one couple’s relationship is the same as the next, there are some interesting trends to note in divorce and marriage.

1. Divorce Rates Have Actually Decreased

According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), marriage rates have actually decreased since 2000, when the rate per 1,000 people was about 8.2. In 2016, the U.S. marriage rate was at 6.9 per 1,000 people. Divorces have also been decreasing steadily since 2000, when the divorce rate was at 4.0 per 1,000 people. In 2016, the U.S. saw one of the lowest divorce rates ever at 3.2 per 1,000 people.

2. Where You Live Could Factor Into How Successful Your Marriage Is

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 Posted on July 17, 2018 in Adoption/Guardianships

For some people, having a child naturally is not in the cards. Many married men and women have trouble conceiving and turn to adoption as a choice for starting a family. Many gay and lesbian couples also choose adoption as a way to grow their family, rather than using other methods, such as a surrogate or donor sperm. However, a bill that is being considered by the U.S. House of Representatives could result in gay and lesbian couples, among other groups, having a more difficult time finding a child to adopt.

Bill Disallows the Federal Government to Discriminate Against Agencies

The 2019 Labor, Health and Human Services, and Education funding bill is in its drafting stages right now, but a recent amendment to the bill, which was passed by the House Appropriations Committee, says that state and local governments cannot discriminate against child welfare service providers based on their religious beliefs or moral convictions. Republican Rep. Robert Aderholt introduced the amendment, which was passed on a vote of 29-23.

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 Posted on July 10, 2018 in Adoption/Guardianships

One of the most common forms of adoption in the United States is step-parent adoption. This type of adoption takes place when either the child’s biological mother or father is married to someone other than the child’s biological parent and that person wants to assume legal rights and responsibilities of the child. Step-parent adoption can be a step that some families take to solidify their relationships with one another, or to establish two parents for a child if one biological parent is not involved in the child’s life. 

Factors to Consider

It is important to understand that a related adoption is a little different from an unrelated adoption. In some ways, it can be easier to adopt a child that is related to you, but it can also have its challenges. Some factors to consider in step-parent adoptions include:

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 Posted on July 05, 2018 in Divorce

One of the most common things people worry about when they are going through a divorce is how it will affect their finances, and for good reason. According to a study conducted by the U.S. Government Accountability Office, women experienced a significant drop in their income after divorce--nearly 41 percent, on average. This can be due to a number of factors, but there are dozens of mistakes you can make when getting a divorce that could negatively impact your finances. Here are some common mistakes you should be sure to avoid:

1. Not Being Prepared

One of the most common mistakes that people make with their finances during divorce is not being prepared for the divorce itself. Divorce is a long and demanding process, so being prepared is crucial. Before you begin the process, you should consult with both financial experts and an experienced attorney to make sure you are making the best decisions.

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 Posted on June 28, 2018 in Divorce

Divorce is an emotionally daunting experience, but it can also be financially daunting, especially when it comes to the assets you own. Splitting your assets during divorce can be a lengthy process, and it can become frustrating if you and your ex-spouse get into bitter arguments about who gets what or how certain property should be allocated. Illinois law dictates that marital property is subject to equitable distribution, and non-marital property is not. In a nutshell, marital property includes any assets that were acquired during the marriage. It is important to understand how to divide certain assets, including the following types of marital property:

1. The House

The easiest way to divide this real estate asset is to sell your house and split the money. This works if neither spouse has a particular attachment to the home, and it offers an easier, less stressful way of dealing with what is often one of the most valuable marital assets. Before you sell your home, you should get the house appraised, ensuring that you know exactly what your property is worth.

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 Posted on June 20, 2018 in Child Custody

Divorcing with children can be difficult. Their living arrangements will change drastically, and this change can be hard on them. Children thrive off of predictability and routine, which is why it is important that you establish a parenting plan prior to finalizing your divorce. Even if things are friendly now, and you and your spouse agree on the parenting situation, having a plan in writing can save you unwanted costs and headaches later.

How Will Parental Responsibility and Parenting Time Be Allocated?

One of the first things you need to determine in your parenting plan is how parental responsibility will be shared and parenting time will be divided between you and your ex-spouse. There are a few different types of parenting arrangements that are common:

• Sole parenting arrangements: This means that the child will live solely or primarily with one parent, and that parent has been allocated total parental responsibility.

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